Score your partner on the facts. Then on the feelings.
A free spreadsheet that scores a partner on what you can actually observe, scores how you feel about them separately, and shows you the gap between the two.
Free. Opens in Excel, Google Sheets and Numbers.
Head, heart, and the gap between them
- Head: the facts
- Four categories of things you can observe. How they handle conflict, where they’re heading, how they live, whether the attraction goes both ways.
- Heart: the feelings
- One category for how it feels right now. Scored on its own, so it can’t quietly inflate everything else.
- The gap
- Heart well above head: possible infatuation. Head well above heart: something is missing that a checklist can’t see. The sheet says which.
- The watch list
- Matters a lot, scores low: the row turns red. Those are the conversations to have.
How to use it, from the person who made it
Video coming soon: a walkthrough of the Welcome, Ranking and History sheets.
Four categories for facts. One for feelings.
The traits inside each one are yours to write. Rename them, delete them, add rows, add a whole category: the totals follow.
Emotional & Relational
How the two of you handle each other, conflict included.
Core Life Alignment
Where you’re each heading, and whether it’s the same place.
Lifestyle & Interests
The everyday stuff. Travel, gym, animals, cooking, whatever yours is.
Physical / Practical / Other
Attraction both ways, plus anything that fits nowhere else.
Personal Feelings
How it feels right now. Scored on its own, and labelled “pot. misleading” in the sheet on purpose.
Find out whether your head and your heart agree.
Two versions, both free. The original is the five-minute one. The second adds the parts that tell you something back. Same traits, same weights, same categories in both.
v1, the original
- Weight each trait, score it, get one overall number.
- Quick to fill in, nothing to interpret.
- A blank score counts as zero.
- No history, no chart. Keep your own notes.
v2, recommended
- Head and Heart scored separately, with the gap read for you.
- A confidence per score. Important guesses turn yellow.
- A watch list: important traits scoring low turn red.
- A blank score means “not yet” and is left out of the average.
- A History sheet that charts each partner over time.
Open v2 in Google Sheets or Excel. Apple Numbers strips the red and yellow highlighting and breaks the History sheet.
Something broken, missing or wrong?
A formula that misbehaves, a trait you think belongs in the list, or a question about how to read the gap. I want to hear it.